Okay
by FadingBehindEyes
Summary: A very awkward and random story. For some reason, Janus turns into a Gothic. And Virginia is willing to fix his so called biggest mistake of your life. WA3 This is just wrong. R
1. Gothic Janus

"Janus, this is the biggest mistake you've ever made," Virginia said, speaking to the 23 year old man sitting on the chair.

Everything was black. He dyed his hair black. He also pierced his ear three times. Head to toe, Janus was covered in belts and black.

"Janus! Pay attention to me!" Virginia fussed.

"Shut up, bitch."

That was what he said to her.

"Janus, I'm sure you are going through a phase in life," said Virginia, regaining her sanity. "Like the time you took those happy pills."

_Flashback_

Janus kicked open the door as he busted into Romero's room.

"I love you! Give me a hug!"

Romero just store at him wide-eyed. "You took the whole bottle didn't you?"

_End Flashback_

"Last time, he had to close the window on your private spot because you almost squeezed him to death." Virginia said to Janus. "Then you had to call the police to help get you out once the happy pills wore off. And after that, you had to call the police again because you _accidentally_ strangled him."

"Whatever," mumbled Janus.

"Whoa, what made him go Goth?" Gallows asked.

"I don't know," said Virginia. "I better stop him before he hurts somebody or himself."

Jet popped his head through the door. "Did you say hurt somebody? I can do that!"

"I wasn't talking to you Jet! Please leave a message after the beep," she said, trying to tell him off.

"Yeah," said Jet. "I've got something to say, BEEEEEEEEEEEEP you!" Jet left abruptly. Clive and gallows laughed at their naive leader. Janus didn't even smirk like he usually does. He just sat there with an angst look on his face.

"I know what to do," Gallows yelled heroically. He started making silly faces. All Janus did was poke his eyes with both his middle fingers.

"Did he do anything?" Virginia asked.

"Yeah, he made me go blind, and at the same time double-flipped me off."


	2. Solution

"Why do you think Janus would go like this?" Clive asked.

"His life has been pretty crappy," said Virginia. "Gallows is still in the hospital recovering from eye surgery."

The Maxwell team glanced over to sad Janus, resting his elbow on his lap and grasping his chin with sharp black filed nails.

"I have to go talk to him," said Virginia walking towards Janus.

"Okay, just tell me," said Virginia. "Why are you doing this?"

"Life sucks," mumbled Janus.

"Janus, life only sucks if you think of it like that," she said, trying to reason with him.

"Whore."

Virginia's eyes bulged madly. "What did you call me!"

"I called you a freaking' slut," groped Janus. "Now leave me alone to rot."

Virginia was at anger state now. "Janus, even your team is scared of you!"

Janus sadly looked up to Virginia. "They were already scared of me before. Why change now?"

Virginia didn't know what to say. She calmly strolled back to her team.

"How did it go?" Gallows inquired.

"Uh, still no dice," said Virgie. Virginia suddenly had an idea. "Let's bring him everything that used to make him happy!"

"Why should we help him!" Jet snapped.

Virginia crossed her arms angrily. "He helps me carry stuff. How is he supposed to help me all sad! "

Clive, Gallows, and Jet: "WHAT!"

"I am a woman," stated Virginia. "A woman such as me should not have to carry that many groceries!"

Jet sneered at his bubblehead leader. "Pft! Mall whore!"

"Jet Enduro, just shut up!" Virginia glared. "If he doesn't snap out of it, then I will have to carry all my stuff!"

"Fine!" Jet yelled.

"Hey, don't we get a say in this?" Gallows asked.

"No!" Virginia screamed.

"Anyway, what does Janus like?" Clive asked.

"I know! Maybe we should think about his pocket watch he always carries around." Virginia bubbled happily.


	3. Pocket Watch

Well, next thing you know, they end up at a watch shop.

"Which one should we get him?" Virginia cheerfully said.

"Let's give him this instead!" Jet said displaying his middle finger.

"Jet, that's not very nice." Virginia said, putting her hands to her hips.

"Watch whore…"

"Whatever Jet, anyway, I found the perfect watch for him!" Virginia yelled, holding a gold pocket watch strapped from a shiny gold string. The team quickly made a purchase then left.

"Here Janus, it's a new watch!" Virginia squeaked.

Janus only said this.

"Watch whore…"

"Exactly," said Jet.

He violently grabbed the watch then chewed it to pieces. Afterwards he spat metal at the surprised team.

"Great, I have to get eye surgery again!" Gallows yelled with a piece of metal poked through his eye.

Everyone was ignoring him.

"Well that didn't work," said Clive. "What else makes him happy?"

Virginia's light bulb appeared above her head.

"I know, let's get him a date!"


	4. Date

Disclaimer: I do not own the song title by Bubba Sparx or The Killers.

"Janus, get a date?" said Gallows. "Do you think anyone will date him like this?"

"Why is everyone talking about Janus?" snapped Jet. "I get all the girls!"

Looks out monitor suspiciously

"We weren't talking about you Jet," said Virginia. "Let's go to Do not try to go to the actual website because I don't think it exists, and even if it does, you just wasted a moment of your life. 

"Damn Gallows, you got a slow internet service," said Virginia.

"Check my computer," said Jet. "It's faster."

Nobody paid attention to him.

"Hello, no it can't be!" Jet got on his knees. "Notice meh! Notice meeeeeeeeeeh!"

(To the people reading, please give Jet attention. He needs some from yooooou!)

"Quiet Jet, we're trying to find Janus a date," said Virginia, typing away.

Gallows's sad internet finally made it.

"Letme do it!" said Gallows, typing in a description.

**Name:**

**Janearth **

**Surname:**

**Cascade**

**Nickname:**

**Janus**

**Sex:**

**Yes please!**

**Race:**

**Alien**

**Languages spoken:**

**Language of the dead! O.O**

**Age:**

**153**

**Occupation: **

**Killer Clown/Gothic**

**Personality:**

**I just became Gothic. I have a bad sense of humor. I run around in a clown costume and slaughter helpless children with a chainsaw. Please date me.**

**Hobbies: Banging ur mom. XD**

"Gallows, gimme that!" said Virginia.

Gallows click the send button.

**0 replies.**

"Gallows!"

"What, I thought it would be funny?"

**1583 flaming replies**

They read the first one.

**MsNewBooty:**

**If you're going to make a fake profile, make it at least convincing. I don't see how this can be funny. That's what's wrong with guys these days! They never are the sensitive type. Go ahead and play with your stupid games. **

**Guys like you never seem to GROW UP! With that, you'll never find a date!**

"At least have one good reply!" said Gallows.

**1 reply**

Everyone was surprised, but they read it.

**HomicidalManiacGirl666:**

**Do you think I'm really a girl? I want to peel your skin off and keep you to myself. Expect some emails. Goodbye!**

They store wide-eyed.

"Let's make another account," said Gallows.

"Yeah, that will keep our skin safe," said Jet.

"So that's why I can never get a date," said Gallows.

"Let me try," said Virginia.

**Name:**

**Janearth**

**Surname:**

**Cascade**

**Nickname: **

**Janus**

**Sex:**

**Male**

**Race:**

**Caucasian**

**Languages spoken:**

**English**

**Age:**

**23**

**Occupation:**

**Drifter**

**Personality:**

**I'm a sensitive, tender guy who's very emotional. I'll take care of whoever dates me and protect them with my life. I'm also a real romantic and don't mind chick flicks.**

**Hobbies:**

**Dinners in the moonlight, long walks on the beach.**

"You got a nasty taste in guys," said Gallows.

"Shut up."

**1,890,567 replies and growing.**

"See Gallows, you know how many girls would kill for a guy like that?" said Virginia.

They read the first reply.

**DisasterGirloftheWasteland:**

**You're going to be my date whether you like it or not! **

**Hi! My real name is Shamila and I'm 21. I don't know how many guys there are like you. Wanna go out tonight? I know a hot restaurant we can go to and have that dinner in the moonlight.**

"This is our chance!" said Virginia.

**Mr. Brightside:**

**Sure.**

**DisasterGirloftheWasteland:**

**Like okay. Here's where it's at.**

_**Lotus Capital Restaurant**_

_**Claiborne**_

**I've already reserved us a seat on the balcony. I didn't read your name because I want it to be a surprise when I get there. Meet you there cutie.**

xxx

"Come on Janus, you got a dinner date to go to," said Virginia.

They had to drag him there.

"Okay, Janus, just wait here." said Ginny. The sat him down on the balcony chair.

"This Shamila girl will be here any second," said Virginia. A blond woman in a silver sequin dress came forward. She was wearing a mask just like the masquerade.

"I'm here my darling," she sat down in the chair and took off the mask.

"OMFG, Janus!"

Virginia looked at his date.

"Maya!"

Maya tightly gripped her mask. "There is no way I'm dating a guy like him! Especially looking like that!"

Janus sat with his head on the table. "Likewise you whore."

"I'm leaving," said Maya.

"Sure thing, _Shamila_," laughed Gallows.

"Todd, get the car!" said Maya. "We're leaving."

"Yes milady."

"Well, that was a flop," said Virginia. "I don't get it. What in this world will make him happy!"


End file.
